I think it deactivated its facebook account because not "enough" people liked it, so it was lonely, but also, it had "too many" friends, and that gave it social anxiety.
I think it broke up with its significant other because it didn't get to spend "enough" time with it and because it wouldn't do "anything" it wanted it to do.
I think it quit its job because it was working "too" much and it was "too" tired and didn't have "enough" time to do things; then it got depressed because it was "too" bored and didn't have "enough" money to do things.
I think it stopped eating because there wasn't "anything" to eat; the refrigerator was full of "nothing" but leftovers and condiments, and the cabinets were full of "nothing" but cans, boxed goods and spices. I think it thought it was "too fat" any way and "nobody" would "ever" love it.
I think it packed its suitcase violently because it didn't have "enough" things and then it was pissed that it could hardly zip its suitcase because it had "too" many things.
I think it took off and boarded a train headed where it thinks the sun shines brighter and the grass is greener, but of course, it couldn't get there fast "enough".
I think it it did get there, but I think it's probably complaining about how it's "always" getting sunburns and how its allergies are "always" acting up.
I think it wants to put a gun in its mouth because it just "can't" take it any more.
I think I'm gonna go get it, bring it back, and give it something to do.
I think it forgot its purpose.
And I think I forgot how happy it makes me.
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