Monday, October 19, 2015

"No Labels...just Life" blog: Where'd My Gratitude Go?

think it deactivated its facebook account because not "enough" people liked it, so it was lonely, but also, it had "too many" friends, and that gave it social anxiety.

I think it broke up with its significant other because it didn't get to spend "enough" time with it and because it wouldn't do "anything" it wanted it to do.

I think it quit its job because it was working "too" much and it was "too" tired and didn't have "enough" time to do things; then it got depressed because it was "too" bored and didn't have "enough" money to do things.

I think it stopped eating because there wasn't "anything" to eat; the refrigerator was full of "nothing" but leftovers and condiments, and the cabinets were full of "nothing" but cans, boxed goods and spices. I think it thought it was "too fat" any way and "nobody" would "ever" love it.

I think it packed its suitcase violently because it didn't have "enough" things and then it was pissed that it could hardly zip its suitcase because it had "too" many things.

I think it took off and boarded a train headed where it thinks the sun shines brighter and the grass is greener, but of course, it couldn't get there fast "enough".

I think it it did get there, but I think it's probably complaining about how it's "always" getting sunburns and how its allergies are "always" acting up.

I think it wants to put a gun in its mouth because it just "can't" take it any more.

I think I'm gonna go get it, bring it back, and give it something to do.

I think it forgot its purpose.

And I think I forgot how happy it makes me.

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Note to My Beloved Readers:

You're very important to me; more than you will ever know. Through writing about my life, I'm trying to become a better mother. That is, in fact, my penultimate goal. If I succeed, I hope to inspire fellow sufferers of abuse and mental illness like me to survive and thrive (and if I don't succeed, I'm still useful as an example of what NOT to do). So, please, join me! Subscribe by email. Read about my fall from grace, my digging myself out of the trenches of demoralization, and my uphill trudge, battling the demons on the road to restoration, redemption, and happy destiny. We are not alone, you and I. And if you believe it - God's will is where your feet are. If you have any questions, don't hesitate to email me at adorafallbrook@gmail.com. Thank you, and so much love - Adora Fallbrook (nom de plume).